Happy Birthday, Cupcake!

Happy Birthday to me! In case anyone was wondering if the thrill of the birthday had left me during the last 365 days...the answer is NO! In fact, my birthday week was so lovely that I actually forgot to blog (bad birthday girl!) and am having to go back!

In honor of the big 3-9, I have been reviewing my Cupcake List and noticing that this past year has not produced quite the results I had hoped for. (sad birthday girl) I suppose I will cut myself some slack, despite my last blog, since in the last 12 months I have sold a house, which was a very stressful adventure in this economy; ferreted out another place to rent in another state; MOVED to that house and unpacked all my worldly goods without the Major (thanks to Moms); dealt with the stress of renting the house that fell out of Wonderland (can anyone say-no w/d hookups except in my bedroom? wth?); and last but not least, am still learning how to navigate my new life here in the wilds of North Carolina...So I have accomplished some significant things this year, even if they aren't all reflected on THE list.

But now, on to review THE list! First of all, we know that I did complete #1. Start my own blog. I vow to be more consistent this second year in posting my process. As for #2. Catch up on my reading, well, I made excellent progress on that one, and did in fact read a number of books that I would never have read otherwise (and posted about many of them), so I feel pretty good about it, although, to my disappointment, I did not finish all 40 books on the first reading list. I did, however, finish 26 of them. The remaining 14 will just have to roll over into year two, and I will have to pace myself accordingly! (More to follow on just how I plan to do that.) That will be 54 books in year two (the second list of 40 plus leftover 14 from year one). A bit ambitious, am I? (Am I crazy?...don't answer that, please. It is my birthday.)

Skipping down to #10. Learn to shoot a gun. Started on that one, and have now looked up a place nearby where I can go to continue working on that. It doesn't seem that a sharpshooter is made out of one episode of gun-slinging. So practice I will. Fortunately, when I added #11. Take a watercolor class, I didn't mention becoming proficient! I would like to continue to explore this form of creativity, but there is only so much of me to go around. I may have to wait to further explore watercolors until after my fortieth birthday comes and goes. #12. Whiten my teeth is another ongoing goal~I was thinking just today how glad I was that I had the trays made and how nice it is to be able to attend to that little issue without any hassle whatsoever (pretty birthday girl!).

#13. Learn to make my Mom's Black Bottom Pie is also one that I started but must continue if I plan to actually become a proficient. BIG step in the process, Moms gave me a mixer for my birthday! Now there is nothing holding me back! (ummmm....hungry birthday girl) I promised the Major one pie a month until I have achieved perfection. He was delighted. #26. Perform 24 breast self-check exams is a goner. Unless I perform 5 in one month, that is. Ha. But I have devised a way to make sure that I get all 12 in over the next year. (Again, more to follow on that bit of OCD planning.) I did Volunteer my time at Moms' house, #27, with positive results, so scratch that one off the list (thank goodness!).....AND.....there you go. Poor showing for year one, if I do say so myself.

HOWEVER! I have already poked at about THIRTEEN (yay, birthday girl!) of the other items on the list...just haven't gotten far enough to report or (more likely) just haven't blogged about them! So my new birthday resolution is that I will be more forthcoming with my efforts, since they are a huge part of the Countdown process! Now, must go...there is desert somewhere with my name on it!

Cupcake Meltdown

Last week I realized that there is no way I am going to meet my goal of the first forty books of "2. Catch Up on my Reading" by October 8th. What is really disgusting to me is that I have read a zillion books in the last year: mysteries, vamps & werewolves & all manner of paranormal suspense, even a few kid's books on the recommendation of my step-son~ but not THE forty that I had chosen for this project. I have been cramming books in left and right these last few months to try to get there....but right now I am so sick of reading "UP" that I don't even want to look at a book, ANY book, much less read it. And somehow getting the Cliff Notes for this project seems more like cheating than it did in college....

I have realized that while most of my Cupcake goals are not difficult (hello! flossing, watching movies, making lists?!), they will take some time and planning, perhaps more than I first realized. And now my first year is almost gone. (sigh)

So today, as I am trapped inside looking out the window at a week's worth of rain, trying to decide if I should start on an ark or not...looking for some inspiration, I read this, written by Kristin Armstrong in her blog, Mile-Markers:

"This reminded me of some time I spent recently doing some goals and vision work, (try goaltender at goals.lululemon.com–it's great) imagining my life 10 years out, five years out, and one year out. It was a real mind-opener for me. The site explains that failing to reach your goals 50 percent of the time is a good indication that you are motivated and challenged. That was a "huh?" moment for me. Failing 50 percent of the time to me sounds like I'm not working hard enough. Or perhaps I'm not putting myself out there far enough to risk that 50 percent failure rate. Oh. Maybe I'm more willing to write down goals that sound achievable or are at least in the zip code of my comfort zone..."

Now I'd like to tell you that this made me feel instantly better...actually it made me wonder which goals on my Cupcake List weren't going to tank! The truth is I'm not very good at keeping up with my dreams (hence the list and the blog)...and so perhaps I should congratulate myself for making myself vulnerable enough to try, in public-no less, and stop self-flagellating over a less than perfect result.

I have read twenty-five books (of the first 40) to date that I would never have taken the time to read before. In no reality that I recognize should that be viewed as anything but success. And that's my story and I'm stickin' to it.

More Books!

I told you I was reading! So to catch you all the way up on my progress, here are the remainder of the books I have read this summer...

The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood: This was a surprisingly easy read. And interesting, as it takes place in some futuristic time period where the roles of women have been limited to a few and their rights have been all but taken away entirely. All for the greater good, of course. If you want to read a book that makes you think, but isn't going to make your brain explode, this is a good choice. And I loved the ending.

A Room of One's Own by Virginia Woolf: I read this after I finished Atlas Shrugged, which might be why I liked it so much. Another book that makes you think, but not in a head-achy sort of way. Woolf comes by her belief that in order to write fiction a woman must have some money and a room of her own by way of rational thinking. A thought-provoking look at women's place throughout history.

The Enchanted Wood by Enid Blyton: Written in the 1930's, this book is a sweet children's book that would be lovely to read aloud to a little one at bedtime. Three children move to the country and discover The Faraway Tree in an enchanted wood. They meet many new and unusual friends as they climb the tree, and at the tree-top there is always a new and strange land up through the clouds to explore. My favorite was the Land of Birthdays. I'd like my party there this year, please.

Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand: In college I had a professor that extolled the virtue of writing concisely. Ayn Rand did NOT have this same professor. This was, hands down, the LONGEST 1068 pages of my life. The plot and the characters were interesting! Even the pro-capitalism bent got me thinking. But if you could cull out at least half of the lectures and rhetoric, one would have a more manageable treatise on her philosophy of Objectivism. The Major has forbidden me to ever discuss this book again in his presence.

Gone With the Wind by Margaret Mitchell: If Atlas Shrugged made me want to beat my head against a wall every time I picked it up, GWTW was just the opposite. I was so surprised to find that I could hardly put it down once I started! Scarlett alternately impressed me with her fortitude and ability to follow her own heart without caring about the opinions of others and drove me crazed with her insensitivity and inability to understand anyone at all. Ms. Mitchell was a genius. And while not normally an avid reader of historical fiction (I leave that to my dads), I found the portrayal of the South and the description of the "War of Northern Aggression" fascinating. LOVED it. {And thanks to my dear friend Mina who stepped out of her normal genre and read it with me--and became obsessed with all things GWTW!!!...I'm so proud of you!} Next...the movie...all four hours of it....

Succulent Wild Women by SARK: I loved this book. SARK is part artist, part philosopher, part cheerleader and part shrink. Just looking at all the colorful illustrations made me happy. Her writing is inspirational and emotionally powerful~she has overcome much and found a way to heal and accept herself as she is, scars and all. A lesson most of us could learn something from. Her website, Planet SARK, is a wonderful adventure, also. I plan on reading more of her books.

Slowly but surely plowing through the list. Wish me luck...reading is my #1 priority over the next weeks to try to make my goal (gulp)!

27. Volunteer My Time on Morningside Drive

My Moms is hands-down the best moms in the world. (I double-dog dare you to disagree.) She and I have lots in common, starting with such a strong resemblance that should I decide one day to contest my paternity no one would take me seriously. We also share wavy hair, good skin, an obsessive-compulsive need to plan, a love of books, anything whatsoever to do with Christmas, an enjoyment of window shopping anywhere, an ability to find pretty much anything with 98.5% accuracy using our super-spidey sense, and a gentle nature that runs from confrontation at Olympic speed.

There are, however, a few quality qualities Moms has that didn't get passed on to yours truly. For example, she is THE 'Hostess with the Mostess' in any given situation...an amazing party planner with a gracious heart. (My philosophy: Make yourself at home...the fridge is over there.) And as a nurse, she is also exceptionally calm in any given crisis. (Not so, me.) In reverse, there are a few qualities I got that didn't come from Moms (or Dad, for that matter...)

One of those qualities is the ability to organize. Now this may have been a learned trait...from the time I left for college I have moved 16 or so times and my parents have spent the last thirty years in the same home. Irregardless, I have a knack for keeping things orderly (or at least in some sort of controlled chaos). And my beautiful Moms does NOT.

So with this in mind, here is the situation. My parent's parents are all deceased (hence, lots of inherited items); they are empty nesters (hello, old room); they are BOTH (yes, Dads, you, too) Pack-Rats of the highest order. And the family homestead, while not flush with closet space, has an entire back section (read: one-half again the actual living space) that is not used for anything but miscellaneous storage and laundry. Multiply that scenario by thirty plus years and you have...well, a LOT of ...well, we weren't really sure what they had a lot of, but that was the problem!

Enter me. Only daughter of a wonderful mother. I have told her for years that if she passed on prior to sorting through all the chaos in her house I would be following her into the by-and-by and dragging her back by her ear. In an effort to avoid doing just that, I promised long ago to help her with this project. After leaving my job at the end of 2009, I commenced with Operation Organize the Fam!

We started with two mornings per week and my old room. Out of my old closet came loads of her clothes, my baby things she had so carefully saved (so cute!), purses, shoes, china, boxes of old photos....I wasn't entirely certain we weren't dealing with a magical wardrobe that would lead us into Narnia at any moment. And as anyone who has tried to clean out a closet knows, everything you touch requires a decision. Sometimes getting rid of something is the easiest decision to make, because if you keep the little whosit, then you also have to figure out what to do with it! But Moms started strong (with just a little gentle encouragement from me...I have watched a lot of Clean Sweep and Hoarders, after all). We took clothes to consignment, bags to Goodwill, odds and ends to a little shop for seniors, books to the library. When I left after lunchtime each day, she got homework to work on before next week. And s..l..o..w..l..y, my old room turned into a viable guest room again along with a reading nook for her personal enjoyment!

Next up was the built-in in the hallway, the bathroom closet & medicine chest (which hadn't been emptied in about 10 years, I'm sure), the kitchen pantry, a few kitchen cabinets, two china cabinets and (insert ominous music here) the back rooms. We sorted like with like and moved things around to create a special closet for Christmas items, a designated place for extra kitchen gadgets, a shelf for pickle-making supplies, a drawer for miscellaneous gifts and an organized area for all her writing supplies and cards. We started organizing all her decorative items into bins by color and the toiletries into containers according to their specific use. We created a memory box for her to put in old cards, newspaper articles and miscellany (like some angora ankle-cuffs from the 50's!) that she wasn't quite ready to part with. We shopped for containers and pretty organizers (my favorite part!) and spent time talking about what sort of order would help make her life easier. In about 3 1/2 months of mornings we accomplished a lot, and she did even more in between times.

And the best part, of course, was just getting to spend time together. I have been blessed with the most wonderful mother and I so enjoy spending time with her...this was an experience I will always cherish, as I truly felt I was giving back to her a very little bit of all that she has given me throughout my lifetime.

Now since the Major and I moved in June, Moms has been continuing to work on organizing her house...I will have to wait for a visit back home to see what other progress she has made. But no matter if she ever gets everything sorted out, I think maybe I have helped her to discover how good it feels to bring some order to your chaos and how letting things go frees up space, not only in your house, but in yourself. We all need that free space in order to make room for other good things that are on their way to us.

And I need a place to sleep when I come to visit. (Love you, Moms.)

P.S. Have Moms & I inspired you to think about de-cluttering some yourself? Here are a few links to how to donate your old books, DVDs and CDs, cell phones, electronics, old eyeglasses, pet items, prom dresses, women's career-wear, or leftover medical supplies (such as from a prolonged illness in the home). A few other neat links are The Freecycle Network, where you can search by location for things to get (and give) for free in your own area, and Give Your Stuff Away Day on September 25th, where you put usable unwanted items on your curb for anyone to take (in a responsible manner, of course). Very cool idea.

Books

I have fallen into a swirling vortex that is called Hampstead. Moving and the subsequent settling in combined with summer have turned time on its ear for me and four months have sped by-practically overnight.

But I have not been idle during the summer! (Even if I have forgotten to write.) I have worked on #19 Join a Runner's Club, #27 Volunteer my Time, #32 Become a Registered Yoga Teacher, #39 Memorize 10 Favorite Poems, and especially #2 Catch up on my Reading.

More about the others later, but this reading business has been a challenge. I found that I have enjoyed some of the books on my list much more than expected, and a few much less. Starting with the ones above:

The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett: Liked the characters, didn't enjoy the storyline half so much as her other famous work A Little Princess (possibly my favorite book of all time). The story seemed to just...well, END. Abruptly. I did like the friendly little bird....

Daughter of Fortune by Isabel Allende: Excellent. Interesting commentary on the California Gold Rush...and the heroine is wonderfully portrayed. The ending left what happens next to the reader's imagination.

My Life In France by Julia Child: I knew I liked Julia Child when I found out she didn't even learn to cook until her mid-30's, but I didn't expect to LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this book! The woman was even more amazing than I realized, and her story is incredibly interesting.

The Hundred Secret Senses by Amy Tan: It took me a while to figure out what was going on here (it flashes back and forth between characters and the past/present), but once I caught on, I enjoyed the story. If you have read or seen The Joy Luck Club, also by Tan, this book has a similar feel.

Without Reservations by Alice Steinbach: If Julia Child's memoir doesn't make you want to visit France, this book will definitely give you restless feet. Steinbach is a prize-winning journalist and presents some of the loveliest prose I have ever had the pleasure to read. Her trip to Europe (or "Year of Living Dangerously", as she puts it) will make you want to hop a plane to somewhere immediately!

Rebecca by Daphne de Murier: I watched this Alfred Hitchcock classic on film years ago (and again just recently with my step-kids) and was pleasantly surprised that the book was so much better! (Why this surprises me, I have no idea.) de Murier is a great master of suspense and the book fleshes out the story in a way the film does not (as is usually the case). Loved it.

Lavinia by Ursula K. Le Guin: This book is a bit off the beaten path from Ms. Le Guin's normal sci-fi, but when researching books for my list this particular selection caught my eye, and justly so. Lavinia is a very minor character in Virgil's Aeneid that Le Guin has plucked out and proceeded to expound upon. The story is that of Lavinia's life in ancient Italy, from her perspective, and includes a cameo appearance from Virgil himself. It actually made me want to read Virgil's Aeneid...

The Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson: I know this book won a Newberry Award, but I didn't like it. I suppose I just want a happy ending, especially in a children's book. Sorry, Ms. Paterson.

I'm a little concerned about finishing out the list by my birthday this year. Apparently in the Land of Procrastination I have been crowned Queen, because in spite of my reading close to sixty books in the last ten months, I still have 21 left on my list to finish before October 8th. But I'm pressing on...let me get off this computer and go read.

11. Watercolor Class

With the negotiation of the sale of our current house and the hunt to secure a rental in North Carolina, along with the chaos of trying to prepare for the pack and the move, blogging has been low on the list of my priorities this last month!

Even right now, as I sit on my back porch and think about how I am going to miss my favorite part of living here~the songbirds that wake me up in the morning and continue to serenade me all day long~there are a million packing details zooming around in the back of my mind. But since the hardest part of writing is often just the starting, I purposed that today I was going to sit down and begin again!

One of the things that I have completed on my list in the last months was #11. Take a watercolor class. In short, it was wonderful! The Major asked if I was now going to become a 'moody artist'...I told him it depended on how my work turned out! Below is my last painting (a work in progress).

My lovely teacher was Doreen Myers at Center Place in Brandon, a wonderful association that promotes fine arts in the community, and, conveniently for me, is located right next door to the library! Doreen was a wonderful teacher, extremely funny and lively. The class was very small (only 3 of us plus Doreen), so we received quite a bit of one-on-one instruction, which, as I was a beginner who knew nothing of watercolor at all, was extremely helpful!

By the end of the month, in the way of all women starting a new endeavor, I had all the supplies to experiment on my own (paints, special paper and brushes, giant palette and a super cute tote to carry them). And I HAD started experimenting a bit on my own (see green bird, above, which was copied, sort-of!, from my favorite watercolorist's blog~Pam Garrison. If you scroll down about 10 photos in the link, you will find the bird I was trying to copy.)

I also took another workshop at the Bloomingdale Library taught by Laure Ferlita, where the class watercolored a black & white photo copied onto heavy paper (see above). This class was quite informative (Thank you, Doreen, for signing me up!) and Laure's website Imaginary Trips, is an unusual venue for anyone interested in watercolor or sketching. {On a side note, I cannot say enough good things about the Hillsborough County Library System! If you live in the Tampa area and are not taking advantage of this amazing resource, do so immediately!}

In a similar vein as writing, I found watercoloring to be a bit difficult to start once on my own. My lack of sketching ability frustrated me some, although apparently in the watercolor community it is perfectly legitimate to use tracing paper to achieve your outline and then the talent is used to place the watercolor. But to me, I have to confess, that felt a bit like cheating! But what I discovered, as with most things, if you just stop trying to be so impressive, and have a little fun (see above) things become a lot more enjoyable! And since the most important part of any new skill is practice, practice, practice...one must find a certain amount of fun in the process!

So my pictures here are a bit backwards, as this flower (above) was my very first attempt. It turned out okay, if I do say so myself! I learned a few things in this class that I am going to try to keep with me, not the least of which was how to play with the paint!

First, we are our own worst critic. The lovely ladies that I took the class with were so hard on their own work, it hardly seemed that they received any joy out of painting at all! Which I hated for them, as for me the entire thing was completely novel. It could be a bit daunting, to watch Doreen (a self-taught artist, go figure) just whip something right off the page, but I kept reminding myself that nothing that requires real skill comes to any of us right away~you have to enjoy the process of learning. Easier said than done, I know, but an important life lesson for certain.

I believe that I will continue (once I am unpacked again!) to make attempts with the watercolors and hopefully achieve my goal of an art journal. And I know the Major at least will admire all of my efforts (appropriately hung on the fridge), since he was my patron for the experience!

13. Learn to make my mom's Black Bottom Pie: Lesson 1

In honor of Easter, Friday I spent the morning with my Mom, but instead of the usual clutter patrol, we had a lesson in pie.

To fully appreciate this feat, a little background is in order: My Mom's Black Bottom Pie is legendary. My Nana had a housekeeper/nanny named Maggie, who helped raise my Mom and subsequently taught me how to make an excellent hospital corner, who was the original pie maker.

When my Mom decided that she would like to learn how to make it, she asked Maggie come to our house and teach her...but Maggie would show up with a pie already made! Lovely, but no help to the learning process. So Moms dug in and tried the recipe on her own. As she will tell you, you had to eat her first effort with a spoon...for about three days. Several people have asked her for the recipe since those days and made the attempt themselves, with equally poor results.

However, over time, and a little input from Maggie on what she was doing wrong, Moms figured out all the pie's tricks, and it became the desert of choice for family and friends alike. You were special indeed if my mom made a pie for dinner when you were invited.

For years my family has poked and prodded me to learn how to make this dessert...it really is that good, by the way. It doesn't matter how much you have eaten beforehand, Black Bottom Pie always finds room to slide right down.

It is a graham cracker crust, a layer of what is basically homemade chocolate pudding, a layer of homemade custard, topped with a layer of real whipped cream and chocolate shavings. The trick is doing about five different things all at once to get it together...oh, and being able to make all that stuff from scratch.

But I digress...I have always contended that, frankly, I don't really know anyone that I'd go to all the trouble for. (It takes my mom about an hour to make one, longer if she doubles the recipe. And she is a pie-making machine.)

BUT... in an attempt to carry on a family tradition (and to make my husband happy), I decided that I should learn how to master this, if for no other reason than every woman should have a recipe in her arsenal that will completely impress her mother-in-law. :)

So...with supervision, here is the finished result of my first pie-making lesson! I'll need a little practice to get it on my own, but this was a good start. And there wasn't a scrap left over today at our Easter lunch, so I must have done something right. Or so they tell me. (No one has keeled over yet...)