Cupcake Meltdown

Last week I realized that there is no way I am going to meet my goal of the first forty books of "2. Catch Up on my Reading" by October 8th. What is really disgusting to me is that I have read a zillion books in the last year: mysteries, vamps & werewolves & all manner of paranormal suspense, even a few kid's books on the recommendation of my step-son~ but not THE forty that I had chosen for this project. I have been cramming books in left and right these last few months to try to get there....but right now I am so sick of reading "UP" that I don't even want to look at a book, ANY book, much less read it. And somehow getting the Cliff Notes for this project seems more like cheating than it did in college....

I have realized that while most of my Cupcake goals are not difficult (hello! flossing, watching movies, making lists?!), they will take some time and planning, perhaps more than I first realized. And now my first year is almost gone. (sigh)

So today, as I am trapped inside looking out the window at a week's worth of rain, trying to decide if I should start on an ark or not...looking for some inspiration, I read this, written by Kristin Armstrong in her blog, Mile-Markers:

"This reminded me of some time I spent recently doing some goals and vision work, (try goaltender at goals.lululemon.com–it's great) imagining my life 10 years out, five years out, and one year out. It was a real mind-opener for me. The site explains that failing to reach your goals 50 percent of the time is a good indication that you are motivated and challenged. That was a "huh?" moment for me. Failing 50 percent of the time to me sounds like I'm not working hard enough. Or perhaps I'm not putting myself out there far enough to risk that 50 percent failure rate. Oh. Maybe I'm more willing to write down goals that sound achievable or are at least in the zip code of my comfort zone..."

Now I'd like to tell you that this made me feel instantly better...actually it made me wonder which goals on my Cupcake List weren't going to tank! The truth is I'm not very good at keeping up with my dreams (hence the list and the blog)...and so perhaps I should congratulate myself for making myself vulnerable enough to try, in public-no less, and stop self-flagellating over a less than perfect result.

I have read twenty-five books (of the first 40) to date that I would never have taken the time to read before. In no reality that I recognize should that be viewed as anything but success. And that's my story and I'm stickin' to it.

More Books!

I told you I was reading! So to catch you all the way up on my progress, here are the remainder of the books I have read this summer...

The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood: This was a surprisingly easy read. And interesting, as it takes place in some futuristic time period where the roles of women have been limited to a few and their rights have been all but taken away entirely. All for the greater good, of course. If you want to read a book that makes you think, but isn't going to make your brain explode, this is a good choice. And I loved the ending.

A Room of One's Own by Virginia Woolf: I read this after I finished Atlas Shrugged, which might be why I liked it so much. Another book that makes you think, but not in a head-achy sort of way. Woolf comes by her belief that in order to write fiction a woman must have some money and a room of her own by way of rational thinking. A thought-provoking look at women's place throughout history.

The Enchanted Wood by Enid Blyton: Written in the 1930's, this book is a sweet children's book that would be lovely to read aloud to a little one at bedtime. Three children move to the country and discover The Faraway Tree in an enchanted wood. They meet many new and unusual friends as they climb the tree, and at the tree-top there is always a new and strange land up through the clouds to explore. My favorite was the Land of Birthdays. I'd like my party there this year, please.

Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand: In college I had a professor that extolled the virtue of writing concisely. Ayn Rand did NOT have this same professor. This was, hands down, the LONGEST 1068 pages of my life. The plot and the characters were interesting! Even the pro-capitalism bent got me thinking. But if you could cull out at least half of the lectures and rhetoric, one would have a more manageable treatise on her philosophy of Objectivism. The Major has forbidden me to ever discuss this book again in his presence.

Gone With the Wind by Margaret Mitchell: If Atlas Shrugged made me want to beat my head against a wall every time I picked it up, GWTW was just the opposite. I was so surprised to find that I could hardly put it down once I started! Scarlett alternately impressed me with her fortitude and ability to follow her own heart without caring about the opinions of others and drove me crazed with her insensitivity and inability to understand anyone at all. Ms. Mitchell was a genius. And while not normally an avid reader of historical fiction (I leave that to my dads), I found the portrayal of the South and the description of the "War of Northern Aggression" fascinating. LOVED it. {And thanks to my dear friend Mina who stepped out of her normal genre and read it with me--and became obsessed with all things GWTW!!!...I'm so proud of you!} Next...the movie...all four hours of it....

Succulent Wild Women by SARK: I loved this book. SARK is part artist, part philosopher, part cheerleader and part shrink. Just looking at all the colorful illustrations made me happy. Her writing is inspirational and emotionally powerful~she has overcome much and found a way to heal and accept herself as she is, scars and all. A lesson most of us could learn something from. Her website, Planet SARK, is a wonderful adventure, also. I plan on reading more of her books.

Slowly but surely plowing through the list. Wish me luck...reading is my #1 priority over the next weeks to try to make my goal (gulp)!

27. Volunteer My Time on Morningside Drive

My Moms is hands-down the best moms in the world. (I double-dog dare you to disagree.) She and I have lots in common, starting with such a strong resemblance that should I decide one day to contest my paternity no one would take me seriously. We also share wavy hair, good skin, an obsessive-compulsive need to plan, a love of books, anything whatsoever to do with Christmas, an enjoyment of window shopping anywhere, an ability to find pretty much anything with 98.5% accuracy using our super-spidey sense, and a gentle nature that runs from confrontation at Olympic speed.

There are, however, a few quality qualities Moms has that didn't get passed on to yours truly. For example, she is THE 'Hostess with the Mostess' in any given situation...an amazing party planner with a gracious heart. (My philosophy: Make yourself at home...the fridge is over there.) And as a nurse, she is also exceptionally calm in any given crisis. (Not so, me.) In reverse, there are a few qualities I got that didn't come from Moms (or Dad, for that matter...)

One of those qualities is the ability to organize. Now this may have been a learned trait...from the time I left for college I have moved 16 or so times and my parents have spent the last thirty years in the same home. Irregardless, I have a knack for keeping things orderly (or at least in some sort of controlled chaos). And my beautiful Moms does NOT.

So with this in mind, here is the situation. My parent's parents are all deceased (hence, lots of inherited items); they are empty nesters (hello, old room); they are BOTH (yes, Dads, you, too) Pack-Rats of the highest order. And the family homestead, while not flush with closet space, has an entire back section (read: one-half again the actual living space) that is not used for anything but miscellaneous storage and laundry. Multiply that scenario by thirty plus years and you have...well, a LOT of ...well, we weren't really sure what they had a lot of, but that was the problem!

Enter me. Only daughter of a wonderful mother. I have told her for years that if she passed on prior to sorting through all the chaos in her house I would be following her into the by-and-by and dragging her back by her ear. In an effort to avoid doing just that, I promised long ago to help her with this project. After leaving my job at the end of 2009, I commenced with Operation Organize the Fam!

We started with two mornings per week and my old room. Out of my old closet came loads of her clothes, my baby things she had so carefully saved (so cute!), purses, shoes, china, boxes of old photos....I wasn't entirely certain we weren't dealing with a magical wardrobe that would lead us into Narnia at any moment. And as anyone who has tried to clean out a closet knows, everything you touch requires a decision. Sometimes getting rid of something is the easiest decision to make, because if you keep the little whosit, then you also have to figure out what to do with it! But Moms started strong (with just a little gentle encouragement from me...I have watched a lot of Clean Sweep and Hoarders, after all). We took clothes to consignment, bags to Goodwill, odds and ends to a little shop for seniors, books to the library. When I left after lunchtime each day, she got homework to work on before next week. And s..l..o..w..l..y, my old room turned into a viable guest room again along with a reading nook for her personal enjoyment!

Next up was the built-in in the hallway, the bathroom closet & medicine chest (which hadn't been emptied in about 10 years, I'm sure), the kitchen pantry, a few kitchen cabinets, two china cabinets and (insert ominous music here) the back rooms. We sorted like with like and moved things around to create a special closet for Christmas items, a designated place for extra kitchen gadgets, a shelf for pickle-making supplies, a drawer for miscellaneous gifts and an organized area for all her writing supplies and cards. We started organizing all her decorative items into bins by color and the toiletries into containers according to their specific use. We created a memory box for her to put in old cards, newspaper articles and miscellany (like some angora ankle-cuffs from the 50's!) that she wasn't quite ready to part with. We shopped for containers and pretty organizers (my favorite part!) and spent time talking about what sort of order would help make her life easier. In about 3 1/2 months of mornings we accomplished a lot, and she did even more in between times.

And the best part, of course, was just getting to spend time together. I have been blessed with the most wonderful mother and I so enjoy spending time with her...this was an experience I will always cherish, as I truly felt I was giving back to her a very little bit of all that she has given me throughout my lifetime.

Now since the Major and I moved in June, Moms has been continuing to work on organizing her house...I will have to wait for a visit back home to see what other progress she has made. But no matter if she ever gets everything sorted out, I think maybe I have helped her to discover how good it feels to bring some order to your chaos and how letting things go frees up space, not only in your house, but in yourself. We all need that free space in order to make room for other good things that are on their way to us.

And I need a place to sleep when I come to visit. (Love you, Moms.)

P.S. Have Moms & I inspired you to think about de-cluttering some yourself? Here are a few links to how to donate your old books, DVDs and CDs, cell phones, electronics, old eyeglasses, pet items, prom dresses, women's career-wear, or leftover medical supplies (such as from a prolonged illness in the home). A few other neat links are The Freecycle Network, where you can search by location for things to get (and give) for free in your own area, and Give Your Stuff Away Day on September 25th, where you put usable unwanted items on your curb for anyone to take (in a responsible manner, of course). Very cool idea.